This is for fathers. For those who always were afraid of having children. For those who want to develop a strong sense of pride in their procreation and show it to the world.
I’m sick and tired of seeing fathers who have the radiance of complete wussies or look like being domesticated by their wifes. This quick guide should prevent you from that and inspire more manliness in modern fatherhood.
You do not often see fathers on a stroll alone with a kid, do you? It’s still not very common to see dads in public taking confidently care of their children. Without any mother in sight. People look. Especially women and other mothers. Some men may feel a little bit awkward and seem to be not completely comfortable. Is it because we’re not used to care about kids or are we a little bit ashamed of it? Maybe it feels a bit unmanly?
As a father of soon to be three who was struggling with fatherhood himself I’ll show you exactly how to develop ultra-confidence in appearing in public with a toddler.
#1 King Lion – Baby Lion
Mindset is everything. Are you proud of your offspring? Heck you co-created this complex living organism with just a tiny drop of your essence and its already walking by itself. Show your pride. This is your descendant. Walk like a king lion who is on a hunting stroll with his baby lion, showing the future king the peasants of his realm. Don’t give a f*ck about who is looking. Check your surroundings. Make sure there is no threat for the carrier of your bloodline. And again, walk with pride.
#2 Have fun
Show the world uninhibitedly that you’re having fun with your kiddo. This is what kids are for. Chase him for a while or inversely. Join him boldly at the playground and swing together. Crawl up the slide greeting him at the top, he will love you for it. Show the world that you’re not giving a f*ck about what’s supposed to be manly or not, but instead that you’re living by your own rules. And those rules say me and my kid shall have fun together.
#3 Body action
Toddlers need a lot of touch and contact. Give generously of it. Show the world that you’re not afraid of closeness. Charming people in general use a lot of body-contact to build up connection in an alluring way. Other people will regard you as a warm and sympathetic person when they see your touchiness with your descendant. Throw him in the air, grab his hand if he wants or do some shoulder-carrying. He won’t break easily. In fact childrens bodies are more robust than those of adults. Dare to show a little bit of your wilder side.
#4 Easy mindset
Nothing’s a bigger turn-off than to watch a dad getting stressed about every little crap of his toddler or is concerned about everything. Leave that to the mothers, we fathers stay calm under pressure. Develop an easy mindset. Don’t expect everything going according to plan when you’re on the road with children. Be mentally ready to improvise at any time and keep your easyness. Like on the battlefield always keep a plan b, c and d in your head if sh*t hits the fan. Where are toilets? Where can you get some food? Make those thoughts automatisms so you don’t worry about it anymore and can decide with ease.
#5 Embrace failure
Don’t be a helicopter typ of parent. This will infect your kid with your subconscious fear. But children need a father figure who radiates confidence. Give him all the wild freedom he needs as long as he doesn’t get in serious danger. Don’t make a dumb comment if your toddler stumbles. Falling down, bumping into something or hitting a rock is the most normal thing in a childrens life.
Show your kid and the world that pain and failure is nothing bad. Especially as a man you incorporate the principle of embracing pain. Failure is the cornerstone of learning and growing. You should know that.
Tell your kid exactly where the boundaries are. This relates especially to strolling on the sidewalk or behaviour in public transports. But as well when you don’t want to buy that garbage candy or not allow him to play with the pigeon sh*t. People around should recognize that you’re a strict man and know which behaviour you tolerate and which not. The same principle goes for business or the military. As a man and especially as father enforcing your boundaries is a heavily important part of your identity. Be rock-hard consequent for everyone visible. Exceptions prove the rules.
#7 Make your toddler laugh
Make fun stuff together. Tickle that wanna-be princess. Make silly faces. Sounds unmanly? To take influence on other’s emotions and make them laugh is indeed a pretty masculine trait. Show that you can take the lead and have the power to provide quick mood-changes. Show the world that you take care of your kid’s emotional well-being. Take them serious, but not in a concerned manner, more rock-in-the-storm style. Become a man that likes to take responsibility for another living being. Other people will get drawn to you and subconsciously seek your presence as well. Women watching you will wish you would make them laugh and take care of.
Easy to memorise for you, I summarise it shortly:
• You’re king lion and your kid is baby lion
• Have fun together
• Involve a lot of movement and touch
• Keep an easy and improvising mindset
• Show that you embrace failure
• Set hard boundaries
• Make your kiddo laugh
Keep fathering proudly